Cooking Lessons
by Randa-Chan
Summary: Cooking is a highly prized hobby amongst all hobbits and as a result, young Peregrin Took decides that it’s high time he taught the King of Gondor the finer arts of cooking. With Legolas caught up in the mix however, things don’t exactly go to plan.


**Cooking Lessons **

**Author's Notes: **Well sorry everyone! I know that I've been missing for ages but I didn't come home from boarding school for six week and then I had exams and I've spent the last two weeks trying to recover. Can you ever forgive me? (gives best puppy dog look) The worst thing was that I couldn't upload my new fics because there was something not quite working in my section of the computer so I've had to do it in Dad's section. grrr That really annoys me!

Anyways, I've had this fic written for ages and I finally finished typing it just then. It's another prank fic. I've also got in mind to do a sequel for **Happy Easter Legolas** so any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Also if anyone would like me to email them when I put something new up then just leave a review mentioning that and I'll add you onto my mailing list.

**Summary:** Cooking is a highly prized hobby amongst all hobbits and as a result, young Peregrin Took decides that it's high time he taught the King of Gondor the finer arts of cooking. With Legolas caught up in the mix however, things don't exactly going to plan.

**Disclaimer: **Strider/Estel/Thorongil/King Elessar, etc…, Legolas, Arwen, Merry and Pippin do not belong to me and are the rightful property of J.R.R. Tolkien as are all of the other Lord of the Rings characters. I make no money out of them and my stories are merely for the enjoyment of everyone.

* * *

'Strider! Strider!' _Still no answer. Where on Arda had that human gotten too?_ This question and many more currently wound their way through Pippin's small, curly hobbit head.

His friend was no where to be found but that didn't surprise Pippin. The new King of Gondor was known for his regular disappearances.

Strider's correct name was Aragorn, son of Arathorn or in other words, King Elessar of Gondor. Strider was just the name given to him when he had once been a ranger of the North.

Even though Strider was now a king that didn't stop him from been Pippin's friend. Neither did it make Pippin think of Strider being anyone else but Strider. Despite his many names, Strider would always be Strider to him and the hobbit was content with that fact.

Legolas, Prince of Mirkwood, was nowhere to be found either. He was currently only one of two elves in Gondor at the moment. After the Fellowship and the War against Sauron was over, Pippin had been quite surprised to see the stern mask Legolas normally wore had slipped from his face. The elf was very merry at heart and would spend hours amusing him, Merry, Sam and Frodo. He was extremely serious however, which was why the hobbits had never discovered the more mischievous side to the elf before when they'd fought during the War of the Ring. After all, a war was no time to be prancing about and telling funny stories.

Strider was also a bit of a trouble maker and Pippin had learned in the past year that he had remained in Gondor, that Legolas and Strider were old friends. Legolas often referred to Strider as Estel nowadays, a name he had explained that Strider had first been called in his youth and one Legolas had known him as for many years. No doubt the two of them were off causing trouble somewhere and right when Pippin needed them too!

'Of all the indecency!' he fumed and stomped back up the steps towards the main section of the palace. There would be no finding the two until they wanted to be found.

As he passed by a small garden outside one of the many kitchen windows on his way to get some food, a small groan was suddenly heard. Pippin stopped and frowned. Quite suddenly, there came a rather large amount of shuffling and rustling from the bushes to his right.

Pippin froze but then relaxed when Legolas, covered in dirt and with leaves and twigs clinging to his hair, stepped out of the bushes.

He groaned again and touched his head gingerly. 'What on Middle Earth happened to you?' asked Pippin. It was certainly not like Legolas to be hiding in the bushes and groaning. 'One word, Estel,' growled Legolas his eyes blazing with icy fury. Pippin winced; the elf was definitely in a bad mood.

He watched as Legolas stumbled off in the direction of Strider's quarters. Briefly the hobbit considered telling Legolas that Strider wasn't there but then decided against it. He was not very experienced when it came to moody elves and he wasn't sure he wanted to find out.

On silent hobbit feet, Pippin crept into the kitchens. Carefully he collected some food and cooking utensils, all the while making sure he kept out of the way of the kitchen servants, it would not do to get caught and certainly not to get in their way.

He hurried through the palace until he came to his and Merry's room where he proudly dumped his loot on his bed. _Now to resume his search for Strider._

It took him a further hour to locate the missing king but at last he discovered him sneaking about in the east wing and looking extremely guilty at that.

'And where have you been?' he demanded. Strider actually jumped, he'd always found it hard to hear the hobbits, especially when hobbits were naturally quiet and their bare feet made no noise of the stone floor.

'No where,' replied Strider innocently. 'Sure,' said Pippin exaggerating the word and then folding his arms. He tried to look as if he were a parent scolding a naughty child but the effect he desired didn't really work. To his credit, Strider did pretend to look slightly guilty at first before breaking into sheepish laughter. Pippin tried to maintain his air of authority but in the end he couldn't help himself and dissolved into laughter as well.

'Now come on, what on Middle Earth have you been up to?' said Pippin when they'd at last calmed down. 'Well,' began Strider biting his lip. 'Out with it,' prompted Pippin. 'You haven't seen Legolas anywhere about have you?' asked Strider.

Pippin frowned as he remembered Legolas' ungraceful attire and entrance out of the bushes. He'd never known the elf to be quite so clumsy come to think of it.

'I last saw him outside near the kitchen gardens.' Strider winced. 'I didn't think he'd be awake yet.' 'Why not?' demanded Pippin.

'Do hobbits talk to everyone this way?' asked Strider irritably. 'You're just trying to change the subject,' said Pippin. 'Besides, I know you've been up to no good and it concerns Legolas. He wasn't in the best of moods when I saw him, in fact, I seem to remember him muttering something about you and that you needed a lesson teaching to you.' Pippin knew he was deliberately blackmailing Strider in a way but he'd obviously done something that deserved the prince's wrath.

He looked at Strider and the human looked back at him. Finally Pippin broke from Strider's gaze. 'Oh fine,' he muttered. Strider smirked at the hobbit in triumph. 'However,' said Pippin turning back to the human, 'I have a lesson of my own to teach you.' 'Oh and what's that?' asked Strider arching an eyebrow at the hobbit. 'You need a lesson in cooking; I've never been with anyone that cooks worse than you.'

Strider looked at the hobbit in surprised. 'Me? Need a lesson in cooking? Come on, it tastes just fine to me.' 'Don't give me that,' shot back Pippin. 'Even Gimli could cook better than you and that's saying something.' 'Well what about Legolas? He can't cook either,' replied Strider. 'He always did the watch; he's excused from this not to mention the fact that you're the only one who's ever tasted his food. Besides, you needn't drag him into this.'

'Look I'll hide you in my room from Legolas but you have to learn how to cook and me and Merry are going to teach you. Even the King of Gondor must know how to cook,' said Pippin as if it were the most logical thing in all of Middle Earth. 'I can hide well enough from Legolas, I don't need your help at all,' scowled Strider.

However, as if to prove Pippin's point there was a loud crash followed by a string of dwarvish swearing bad enough to turn the very air blue. Pippin paled at the words and covered his ears. Strider winced, he knew the voice all to well, royalty Legolas may be, noble tongue he was not. The elf had surprised most of the fellowship with a colourful amount of swearing during their quest. No one had expected one of royal birth (save Gandalf and Strider who already knew the prince well) let alone an elf to know so many dirty swear words. Even Gimli had been impressed.

'When I get my hands on you Estel I'm going to string you up by you ears until they are as POINTY AS **MINE**!' yelled the elven prince.

Strider glanced back at Pippin. 'On second thought, I'll take your offer,' he said. Quickly he and Pippin hurried up the corridor until they could no longer hear the Sindarian Prince.

* * *

'Just where have you been?' asked Merry sharply as soon as Pippin walked in the door. 'Looking for Strider to give him a cooking lesson,' answered Pippin truthfully. 'Aww come on,' groaned Merry. 'You know that he'd never-,' Merry stopped short. 'Never what?' asked Strider who now stood in the doorway behind Pippin. 'I believe the word you're looking for Master Hobbit, is agree,' said Strider when Merry failed to answer him.

Merry scowled at Pippin. 'So what did you bribe him with then?' he asked.

'Estel!'

The King of Gondor jumped as Legolas' angry voice came floating up the hallway.

Quickly Strider rushed past Merry and Pippin then leaped into the cupboard on the opposite side of the room and frantically wrenched the door shut behind him.

He was not a moment too soon because quite suddenly, the door banged the rest of the way open and a very furious elven prince walked in, just about knocking over Pippin in the process.

'Have you seen Estel?' he asked. 'No,' squeaked Pippin before scurrying over besides Merry.

The two hobbits watched as Legolas suddenly paused, not finishing whatever he was going to say. Motioning for silence, the elf crept silently over to Merry's bed and picked up one of the hobbit's pillows. Going back over to the door, Legolas kicked it shut with a loud bang.

Again motioning for silence, Legolas moved over to the cupboard where Strider was hiding. He looked back at the hobbits expectantly. Merry immediately caught onto what Legolas meant but Pippin was quite miffed.

'You can come out now,' called Merry. Right on cue the door swung open and Strider stepped out only to come face to face with Legolas and a very large pillow.

His surprised gasp was quickly muffled by the pillow Legolas swung forcefully at his friend's head.

Again and again he struck. '**I'll-teach-you-to-get-on-my-bad-side-by-drugging-me!**' each word said in time with his' strikes.

The hobbits stared at one another. 'Drugged him!? With what?' said Merry slightly horrified at the thought. 'Dunno,' replied Pippin then the two hobbits shrugged at one another and turned back to watch the fight.

Strider made a desperate duck under Legolas' swing then made a wild leap for Pippin's bed. The elf followed though a lot less gracefully. 'I thought you wouldn't tell!' yelled Strider angrily at the hobbits. The human hurriedly ducked under a nasty swing from Legolas. The elf swore savagely at him and resumed his attack even more furiously.

'We're hobbits, what'd you expect?' replied Merry logically.

'Thanks a lot,' growled Strider.

He ducked under another swing, leapt over the next and made a break for the door.

Legolas however, proved to be too quick as he followed, managed to swerve around the hobbits and catch Strider by the back of his tunic. The man started and all of a sudden fell forward dragging Legolas with him.

Dead silence descended upon the group. The hobbits stared down in shock at the winded human and elf.

'You know,' said Pippin breaking the silence. 'If no one ever said that those two were a King and a Prince, no one would ever know they were let alone believe them.'

Merry gave his cousin a withering look. 'What?' asked Pippin frowning. 'Never mind,' replied Merry with a shake of his head. 'Come and help me get those two up.'

The two hobbits moved in to help their friends, which proved to be a very difficult task. Strider was heavier than Legolas and more severely winded so he found it rather painful to move. Although the elf was lighter, the effects of Strider's "prank" were still present and Legolas appeared to have suffered a sprained ankle in the fall.

Despite the pain of his strained ankle, the elf made little fuss and simply pulled himself back up against the wall much to the hobbit's awe.

'You know Estel,' slurred the elf once the human managed to stand up, 'you have a warped sense of humour.' 'Thank you,' replied Strider dryly.

'Every time you try to play a trick on me it always backfires and then I get hurt and you spend all your time moping about and fussing over me at the same time. Serves you right too,' added Legolas as an after thought. Strider scowled at his friend and moved in to access the elf's injuries.

The hobbits watched curiously, as Strider took the sheets from Merry's bed, tore them into strips and bandaged the elf's ankle gently but firmly. Through all this the elf sat perfectly still as he allowed his friend to work on him.

The hobbits were confused as they remembered the last time Legolas had been hurt. That particular episode had occurred shortly after the Fellowship had set out when Gimli had pushed the graceful elf into a stream full of leeches. The elf had been furious to say the least and certainly hadn't allowed anyone near him to remove the leeches, not even Gandalf. It was only when Strider returned half an hour later with the firewood that the leeches were finally removed from the blond archer's skin. Strider had scolded his friend soundly before making him sit down so he could remove the leeches one by one.

'They care for each other very much,' said a voice quietly behind them. The two hobbits jumped and whirled to face none other than Queen Arwen. She smiled at Merry and Pippin then invited the two hobbits out into the hallway.

'Why?' asked Merry. Arwen laughed her voice bright and silvery. 'Some things never change,' she said referring to the curiosity of the hobbits. When she only received two expected stares, she laughed and shook her head.

'Very well, I will explain why Legolas and Estel have always been so close.

When Estel was a youth, he visited Mirkwood, Legolas' home, for the first time. The prince was very sick after having suffered an orc arrow covered in poison a few weeks earlier. By then, no one thought he would live and Legolas refused to see any more healers. Orcs rarely make any new form of poison but Legolas was unfortunately one of the unlucky ones who suffered from a new make of poison. It always takes a few years before an antidote can be found and Legolas was the first to ever encounter that particular poison. My father, Lord Elrond would have helped if he had known but he was far in the west visiting the elves that lived there and had no hope of reaching the Prince in time. Estel offered to help but was refused like all the others. Knowing he had been taught by the best and being particularly stubborn, Estel snuck into Legolas' room that night to discover the prince in the throws of a fit, which many believe, he never would have recovered from had Estel not arrived in time. He worked all that night to heal the Prince and by dawn, the Legolas was sleeping peacefully for the first time in weeks. Since then, the two have been inseparable and it was Legolas who christened Estel "Strider the Ranger." Their friendship has lasted many years and through many terrible times and I believe, will certainly continue to live on,' finished Arwen.

She smiled at the two hobbits. 'That was a great story,' said Pippin after a few moments silence. Merry and Arwen laughed; it was clear that Pippin was one of those things that would never change.

'So does that mean that I can't teach Strider how to cook?' asked Pippin. 'I'm afraid so,' replied Arwen. 'Estel will be glued to Legolas he's perfectly sure that he is better.'

Pippin sighed forlornly. 'At least I tried. It's just a pity that I'll have no one to teach.'

'You can teach Arwen!' called Legolas, his elven hearing easily picking up their conversation. 'She might be coming up to her 3000th birthday but everything she cooks still tastes like charcoal,' he continued loudly.

'You can't talk orc spawn!' yelled Arwen venomously. 'Lady Arwen!' said Merry and Pippin shocked.

'We'll talk about this later,' said Arwen to the two hobbits before stalking back into the hobbits' room, intent on making Legolas eat his words, sprained ankle or not.

'O.K., maybe I shouldn't be teaching mere children how to cook anyway,' said Pippin seriously. 'I agree whole heartedly,' replied Merry.

'Now Strider's hair, that's another story,' said Merry as he took Pippin by the arm and led his friend off towards the kitchen.

'Don't you think it's far too scruffy for a King? I mean, look at Legolas. Now that is hair fit for a King and he's only a Prince.'

_The hobbits eventually managed to teach Strider how to do his hair with a little help from Arwen and Legolas. _

_After Legolas' ankle healed, it was he that surprised everyone by proving that he could cook and then he taught the King and Queen of Gondor. _

_The Fellowship had many more adventures but those are for another day. _

**The End **


End file.
